Selfish Trust

The fear of trust is one that plagues many people out there. Most people have issues trying to rid themselves of something that has become a part of them. How odd is it that trust can infect the soul so much when it is something you have not sewn? How does one expect to reap the benefits of a deep friendship or love when they can't trust the other person? On the surface it seems as if trust can be easy to learn, but in reality it is one of the leading causes to many failed marriages, broken relationships and insecurities.


How does one trust if they find themselves unable to do it, you may ask. Well if there was a simple formula then it would make one a wealthy person. Trust begins from birth and continues till the last breath. A child must trust his or her mother to nurture them, love them and protect them. An elder may need to trust their children, doctors or close friends to do many of the day to day amenities. See, trust is something that is so captivating to the soul that it scares the living daylights out of many.


The first thing to examine when attempting to understand trust is to first examine your own heart. Are you afraid to put your trust in someone else because you don't think they will be able to do the job you think they can do? Are you that superior to others in every capacity? Some of you may answer yes. If this is how you view life, as you being the superior being to all, then do you control time, weather, or life for that matter? With yourself being the only one you trust, doubt is no longer in the picture. You will never cry, hurt, or struggle throughout life. I do not believe for one second that man can go through life and never feel self-doubt for a single moment. The reality is that we cannot do everything on our own. We cannot control time, weather or life. In history, no earthly man has ever been able to be the all-knowing or doubtless.


The beauty of getting hurt is the glorious advent of healing. In that moment when your heart has been torn, the restoration that follows is strong and powerful. We learn from these moments and begin to understand our limits, our angles and the extent of how far we can trust someone. The common misunderstanding of trust is that you need to give up your whole heart to another individual in order for that to be considered trust. By doing that, you leave yourself vulnerable to complete brokenness. Trust should be given in measures. Begin first with your family. These are the ones that have been placed in your life to love you and to entrust their life in you. It is understandable that not everyone comes from a family that is filled with love, joy and strength. Many come from torn homes surrounded by destruction, emptiness and hatred for one another. Some of you that grew up in this type of environment will find it very difficult to trust someone after the hurt you went through growing up. Can I tell you that to judge trust based on the hurt you went through is to do trust injustice. The pain you went through did not stem from a lack of trust, but a lack of love.


Trust and love are two different entities. They cross paths many times. When you fall in love with someone, you tend to put your trust in them. When you trust someone, typically you have a love for them that is different than that of others. In their complete state, they are two different worlds coming together to strengthen one bond. This is an important aspect that needs to be understood when it comes to blaming a lack of trust on failed love.


If you look at trust in the areas of your friendships and surroundings, it should be a slow process. Get to know people, build a bond with them that is more the surface friendships. Some of you tend to pour out your entire lives to a stranger with no thought to how that person may perceive you or take that information to the rumor mill. I highly urge to you to be careful when doing this because you truly don't know someone until there is seasoning, through time, in that friendship. Grow, learn and open up.


What trust enables you to do is to open up about your feelings, struggles and issues that you may need to deal with. As you begin to trust more, you leave yourself more open to being hurt. Understand that you truly can never fully trust someone here on earth because we are all sinners in our ways. I will tell you over and over that you will get hurt in life because of broken trust. In the end, you will understand that the beauty in trust is that it lets you grow and become stronger. Through every journey in life we will have moments of being in the pit, but look up and see that there is always a light at the Top.


One day you will see that there is only one true Trust. He is the one that will never hurt you, leave you or abandon your love. Trust begins and ends with Him.


To give your trust is to lose some of your selfishness


That is Truth

Bottomless Love

Life is not a fairytale and love is not something you just get for free. We often underestimate all the facets that go along with love. Our society and culture teaches us love as the depiction of two lovers on the big screen doing whatever they want and never losing each other. We see men cheating on their wives and women desiring the affection and affirmation of another man. The root of their marriage is not that of love, but one of convenience. So how does one get to the root of love then?


To love another, one must first begin to have respect for themselves and believe wholeheartedly that it is a commitment and not just a season. Love does not come in seasons. It does not enter your life for you to give up yourself for another only to move on to the next person when the time seems right for you. Surely we will have friends come in our lives to love for the time they are with us, but this is not true love that is in marriages. We are often brought to the affection of someone else by the attraction of our absent affirmation. To fill a void in our lives by just having someone there for you to "love" is a recipe for disaster. If you are to enter a relationship, enter it for the long run and build it around two centerpieces: God and love.


For something good to last, you give it your best. But for something great to last, you never give up. If you are struggling in your marriage or relationship, work harder at it. Understand that love has no end. It does not reach a point where you max out. Rather, love grows to the point where you see no end. If the road seems far, keep steady in your walk, for the reward is magnificent. Teach yourself good habits and work together as one. If the two of you have a strong love for each other, then it is better than one. Learn to communicate and talk things out. Give up your pride for it will kill not only your love, but your heart as well.


You will hear people say there is no such thing as true love. Others will say that love is stupid and all it did was hurt them. One cannot discount their feelings for only God knows the hurt that they have gone through. We must accept them and help them. Well, how do we do this? We do it with love. Amazing how one can be restored by the one thing they felt destroyed them. The power of love is glorious and its fruits are good for the soul. It requires hard work and patience. Love will not come easy. One must treat it as their career and put in the time to ensure that there is no inadequacies. One of the important things to remember is to run after the right type of love.


There are two types of love. The first is a lusting love. You give up your body, mind and heart for physical, emotional and even mental satisfaction. This often comes from different people and is not limited to one person. You tell this other person you love them and will do whatever it is that they want. You typically seek to make yourself feel good by doing whatever it is that the other person wants you to do. You will give up your morals, ethics and purity for a temporary high. Soon after your high, you will be left all alone with the feelings of worthlessness, loneliness and emptiness settling in deep in your heart. This is one type of love.


Or, there is the flip side: pure love. With this you respect who you are and keep your body, mind and heart for yourself. You do not need to be satisfied by the physical, emotional or mental practices of another. You dedicate your life to be with another through the thick and thin. You respect who they are and in turn expect to be respected as well. The satisfaction you get is a life long journey of laughs, tears and wrinkly skin. You seek to grow old and to never be away from them. You seek only one to fulfill this. You hold your morals high and do not cross any lines when it comes to purity. Love is not a physical pleasure, but one that resonates deep within the heart. You do not get high for a temporary time. Your love will get stronger with time. Your heart will be filled and the feelings of worthlessness, loneliness and emptiness will want to attack you, but your foundation will be solid enough to resist all temptations. This is true love.


Love will not fail you, it will find you. Seek it.


That is Truth

Uncontrollable Thankfulness

Something we were all taught at a very young age was to say "Thank you" when someone did something for us or to be proper when showing our gratitude. As we got older, the meaning of thankfulness has seemed to disappear and is more of responsibility rather than showing honor and respect. It's as if it's a burden for us to be thankful these days. We struggle to show our appreciation for anything and everything. We are so down in our lives that we don't have thankfulness because if we can't be happy, than others cannot be happy either.


There are two kinds of thankfulness: The first is the kind we show onto others. This comes in the form of words, actions or unspoken body language. These are the outward expressions we were taught from a young age and have progressed throughout our livelihood. As we have gotten older, this kind of thankfulness has changed and no longer is the customary response it was when we were younger. This leads to the second kind of thankfulness. This comes from within and is an internal form of expression.


Something even harder to learn is to be truly thankful from within. It is very easy to tell someone thank you for what they have done, but it is extremely to truly be thankful in your heart. The fact of the matter is you cannot lie to yourself. It is easy to lie onto others and completely deceive them. The reality is that you cannot trick your heart into truly being thankful for all that your life is. Yes, it may not be a perfect life, but you are living, breathing and able to inflict change in this world. Your life can completely suck to you, but may have meaning to someone else. It is understandable that to be thankful for a life that is full of struggles and hardship may nearly be impossible, but for just a second remove yourself from where you are in life and look at others. There will always be someone who is going through something worse and is more thankful then you.


That is hard to swallow and may even feel like a shot in the gut, but it is a reality check that we all need to see. How can we not be thankful for all that we have and are doing when others in the world are going through way worse situations, yet they are so thankful. If we cannot be thankful for the blessed lives we have now, then we will never be thankful ever no matter what the circumstances are. We can be living lavish lifestyles with endless amounts of money, but will never be truly thankful because we will want more. Our inability to be thankful stems directly from within and is the result of the greed we desire endlessly. This adversely affects our ability to be thankful outwardly. We struggle to be thankful to others because we do not know how to be thankful ourselves.


To be thankful, one has to fully release their own desires and see their life in its naturalness. The natural beauty that lies within breathing, seeing, hearing, touching and moving is incredible. To do just one of those is such an amazing gift. How can you not be thankful for a lifelong ability to do at least one of those. You were created by design by Him, and it is our purpose to be thankful always. It's not healthy to not be thankful. It leads to many negative things and can truly hurt you terribly. Make it a habit to see the best in the worst. Be a positive person even when you are positive that everything is negative. Grow in the life you have been given and follow the narrow road to happiness. 


Live to be thankful and be thankful to be living.

Humbled Beauty

When it is said to you that you should put others before you, how does that honestly make you feel? Is it not a struggle to constantly do onto others and never have something done for you? Many of us can relate to this in many different facets of our lives. We can look at work, our families, friendships, or leadership positions as examples of areas where we put in so much effort and pour into others lives, but rarely have something done for us. Now ask yourself an honest question: Do you truly do onto others for no return, or do you expect some sort of reward for your "goodness."


The safe answer is yes. But I can honestly tell you that you not always do things for others without expecting something in return. The way we are built and how we function has this inner selfishness that is very difficult to harness. We may not show it publicly or physically, but mentally and emotionally we are very selfish people. Even the best and strongest of us are selfish beings. The challenge is to somehow control that part of you. In doing that, you need to understand the true essence of humbleness.


What does it mean to be humble? Typically it is referred to in the actions of doing onto others. Its true meaning goes much deeper then just actions. To be humble is to fully strip yourself from every situation that lies ahead of you and for you to be a vessel of love. Never let anything be of you. Accept encouragement and gratitude, but never take full credit for all that you have done. Remember, before you were born, you were thought of and designed in extravagant design. For if you were not designed the way you are, you would never be where you are today. It would be wrong to take credit for things we have not designed.


When you bring yourself to a place of complete humbleness, it becomes recognizable. No one likes a cocky individual who is all about themselves. But someone who is continuously humble becomes like the gravity we exist within. We are drawn to those individuals because humbleness is contagious. When I tell someone they did a great job at something and I in turn have a response of thank you, but to God be the glory, I get chills. When you look into the eyes of another and you see an honest and sincere redirection of thankfulness to Someone much higher then them, it is truly beautiful.


To be humble is a blessing. But to do it without seeking attention and high remarks is where a man separates himself from a child. This is the process of maturity and wisdom. Be humble and do it in secret. Do it only for it is right and justified. Be a leader and set an example for others. People seek out those who are on firm ground and of sane thinking. Strip yourselves of your pride and replace it with humbleness. It attacks every aspect of your life. Be humble to your family who loves you dearly. Act humble to the co-workers you interact with. Give humbleness a try with a complete stranger. What is truly the worst that can happen? Give up your selfishness and throw on an armor of humbleness. Be bold in setting forth a change that will only benefit you.


For within you lies the inner strength to be humble. Grasp it and radiate its beautiful power.


That is Truth

Solemn Faith

Do you believe without seeing? When push comes to shove, and you are backed into a corner, do your instincts sway to that of you having such a deep faith that nothing can knock you down? Sometimes we cannot control our thoughts and our insecurities throughout our lives, but we can always fight against it to the best of our abilities. To be able to fight, we must understand why we lack faith and why we tend to run away from it then to chase it.


To get to the root of your lack of faith, you need to look only to yourself and nothing else. Your first inclination will always be to point the finger at someone or something else. When you do this, you are telling yourself that you are weak and unable to function on your own. Are you an infant and cannot take care of the basic functions of your life? Well if you are not an infant, then why do you choose to not take responsibility of your own actions. Now that you understand that your lack of faith is only derived from yourself, you need to comprehend what it is within you that blocks out faith.


Perhaps you have wanted something so badly that you hoped and hoped for it, but never received it. Maybe every sign pointed to you being right about something or something happening based on a multitude of factors. But then that did not turn into what you wanted and you saw it as a let down. This may have happened to you time over time. Have you ever gone through life wondering, why can I not catch a break? You see all the people around you doing well and having prosperous lives, yet you struggle to make ends meat week after week.


Let me tell you one thing about the fight to overcome obstacles. In every aspect of life, when you overcome, you have built strength and character. That man or woman who lives a lavish life cannot compare to you when all hell breaks loose in their life. The reality is they will succumb to a faithless life and give up. You have fought hard and worked diligently to not give up on all that you pursued. Do you not see that through all of this, you grasped faith and did not notice it? Your ability to fight and focus on your goals ahead of you was the nucleus of your faith.  See, you have the ability to have faith and to pursue all that your heart desires. Understand that sometimes what your heart desires is not what you need, and to run after your desires will always leave you empty. Have faith in what you need and the essentials to grow.


Don't let your past decide your future. If hoping in something did not blossom, then have faith. Hope is not faith. Hope is a deceptive illustration of faith without the true meaning of believing without seeing. Through hope you have imagined your end goal, the result of your ambition. In faith, you do not know what is to come, but you believe with all your heart that everything will be okay. If things seem slow, continue to wait and understand that it is not on your timing that great things come, but it is on His. I am not telling you to give up your dreams and to not chase after different ambitions in life, but I am telling you that if all you do is hope and chase, then where is the faith. When you are let down, you will be hurt. Hope is only a one sided outcome in your mind. Either you get what you want, or it is the end of the world. Through faith, you have understood that no matter what the outcome is, you will accept it for it is what's best for you.


When you fully grasp faith and cling on to it with all that you are, you will see its powers and mighty strength. A person who lives on faith will be like a man who builds his house on solid rock. You need to put in the time to live in faith, because if you don't, then how will you ever be prepared for the storms to come. Live your life everyday with a faith that is stronger then your neighbors. We all have the ability to fill our lives with more faith. We can all afford to release our selfish desires and replace them with faithful ambition. Do not give up when you are told no, but live on to see life one more day.


For I have faith that tomorrow's tests will be stronger then yesterdays. To that, I will overcome for my faith is deeper and stronger today.


That is Truth

Loveless Idols

In your lowest of lows, where do you run to? I am talking about being completely down in the pits, where do you go? Many of you will run to some sort of loved one, or a friend. Some may seek some sort of substance like alcohol or drugs. Others will inflict some sort of harm to themselves to relieve the pain that goes on within them. The one commonality that exists within all these is the limit of time.


You run to these things to escape, but soon find yourself without some sort of hope. For a moment you were relieved from all your struggles, pain, and emptiness. What happened after the moment of relief ran away from you? Did you go back to it again, find some other method of relief, or give up all together? Each of these things you run to will always leave you wanting more and will never fully satisfy you to your full satisfaction. The girlfriend or boyfriend you pretend to love and "gave" yourself to is nothing but a masked dagger in your heart when all you use them for is relief rather then a future of marriage. When you insist to have someone in your life to find affirmation for yourself, you are telling everyone that you are weak, lost and without purpose.


Do not run to those who will not run after you. When we love the things of this world without realizing everything on this earth will soon fade, we are running blindly into a dark, shallow hole digging our way deeper only to never get out. I can guarantee you that nothing in this world will fully satisfy your thirst to fully be loved. The times you get drunk may feel good and fun, but for a second release yourself from your body and look upon yourself and how pathetic you look falling over everywhere drunk and without control. Every time you get high, bring yourself low to gaze upon a person who has to smoke something in order to crack a smile. Crack a smile without being a crackhead and maybe, just maybe you will see life with clear vision, not dilated.


The funny thing is that you continue to run after things that you know will never satisfy you, and that never stops you for a second to think twice. Is there not even a glimpse of doubt within your soul? I do not believe for a second that there is one self-help book that will give you the answers or remedies for your depression, pain and emptiness. There is no author, doctor or psychologist who will be able to make everything go away for you. The reality is that you will go through a life with all kinds of ups and downs.


What will separate you from all those around you is how you will deal with it. Your decision to chase after something will be your deciding factor. What if today you decided to chase after Him for all your struggles, heartbreak and anger? What if you opened the life-book and saw the words within it that screamed love into your face? He is the great Author, Doctor and Psychologist. He will never leave you, forsake you or hurt you. At this point in your life, you have tried everything else and it has gotten you no where. So why not give Him a shot? What is the worst that can happen? If He fails you, then go back to your drugs, your drinking and a life of sex. Go back to cutting your wrists and relieving all the pain you go through. But before you go back to that, give Him and honest shot and I guarantee you that you will not be disappointed.


This is no sales pitch or easy buy. It will be hard work. You will fight hard and run harder. But the relief you will find after knowing you found true love will bring you to your knees in worship of Him. Nothing compares to Him and nothing will ever be close to Him. He makes you go through things in your life so you can chase after Him even harder. I know life is hard and that you all have been to hell and back. I wish I could tell you that it was all worth it. The reality is that we have all lost so much, but not enough. He lost everything to gain you. He gave up His life for every single one of you. If you think it is too late, then I tell you that it will only be too late if you continue to wait. Choose Him for He choose you.


I will chase after the One who chases after my love


That is Truth

Irreplaceable Family

One thing will always remain constant throughout our lives: friends will come and go, just as a rose blossoms then withers away with time. Each has their place in your life and then goes on to other things. Some may stick with you and will be an all-important part to your life. We tend to refer to these people as best friends. They have shared many memories and have for the most part, stuck by your side through the thick and thin.


But what happens when all of a sudden, that person has to move away? Communication instantly becomes an issue no matter how advanced technology goes. Aside from that, even with the advancement and quality of technology, it doesn't replace that closeness. What eventually happens in so many instances is, the distance becomes a reason to walk away. Both parties move on and that deep friendship that was once there has become a mere memory stamped into the timeline of our life story. Over time, those memories fade and the names of each other may even find its way into the abyss. This unfortunately, is the reality of friendships.


There is however, one group of friends that will never be a season or temporary. These are the friendships of your family. The most important God-given gift to each of you that can never be replaced by any one friend or object. There is a love within a family that is unlike a love a friend will have to another. This love exists deep down into the heart and soul of each other. It is the glue that holds everything together. A love within a family can be so beautiful and precious. In its purest sense, a loving family is worth more then anything this world can ever try to compare to. Not the riches of the richest kings can be enough to even come close to the love a family can have for one another.


The loving family is unfortunately not a reality in many homes. Today, there are so many broken families, torn apart by divorces, deaths, separations and just hate. Children are forced to fight a battle that was not in their dreams. No child deserves to have to fight for love within his or her own family. No child deserves to be without a mother or father. There are unfortunate tragedies that have caused children to say goodbye to a loved one. These are prevalent everywhere in our society, as elsewhere. The true tragedy is when a family is torn apart because of a lack of love for one another.


Love does not just get up and walk away one day. It is not a project or craft that can be tweaked with a little bit of Elmers glue and some yarn. Love within the realms of family is created through birth, designed to be pure, wholly and joyous. Within the figments of our blood our love resides. It is unseen, but is fully known. Love is what holds a family together. A family can only stay together for so long when there is not true love present all throughout the home. To see a family broken and dying is just as bad as seeing the endless tragedies throughout the world.


The family you have today, whether it is one or many, is the greatest gift you have. If you lack those relationships, I urge you to pursue them and restore them to the best of your ability. Find a way to bring joy, love and peace back to the bond that was created at the moment of conception. The moment your mother laid her eyes on you and smiled, was a moment of true love. Whoever that person is in your family, whether it is a mother, father, brother, sister or distant relative, find a way to bring that moment of true love back into the equation. I understand that some relationships within the family are so strained that even the pursuit of love will go without fruition. But I insist that you do not give up loving them within your own heart. Think of them often, pray for them, and before you breathe your last breath on this earth, ensure that deep down in your heart, that you do purely and truly love them.


On that day when you are stricken with sickness, the first and the last to your side will always be the first to have ever loved you: Family


That is Truth